| Change in plethoric amounts |
[Jun. 27th, 2016|10:57 pm] |
Welcome to Morphication.
A record of my metamorphisis from a freak with freakish breasts to a freak that looks like a normal girl.
The plan is to keep this journal public yet anonymous. If you actually know me, please keep the personal comments to my personal journal. Also, although you can feel free to refer others to this journal, please keep my identity private unless I've given my consent.
Any woman that undergoes a breast reduction goes through a psychological process. But I'm not just any woman. Besides the obvious statement that I'm me, I'm also a woman whose breasts are part of my identity as part of the greater BDSM community.
People actually see my breasts. People tie them up, pierce them, hit them and view them. Grope them and lick them. Men. Women. Transfolk. Men dressed as women. Women dressed as men. People dressed like animals. You get the picture.
Obviously I am more than my breasts.
A partner of mine suggested that I start this journal, once it become obvious that I have significant feelings associated with the reduction. Mixed feelings.
So this journal is a farewell to the old breasts. I plan to document each step of the process as I go. I plan to solicit those I play with and care about to each say their own private goodbye. To tie them up, or cane them or pierce them a final time. And I plan to photograph and journal that process. (Breasts only!)
And I plan to document the phsycial changes to my breasts post surgery. How it affects my play and my way of interacting with people from a BDSM perspective. How I percieve others views of me to morph, both from a vanilla and a kink perspective.
I'm not sure what will transpire. But I must believe its worth it to undergo such a drastic step.
June 27th 2006.
Height 5'
Weight 167
Bra size 38I.
Consult with plastic surgeon scheduled for July 24th, 2006. |
|
|
| Body Mod by Daddy's wishes. |
[Jul. 9th, 2006|02:54 pm] |
Let me preface by saying that my decision to reduce my breasts was my idea, and always my choice to carry out.
However my Daddy/top is getting a lot of mileage out if it, simply by talking about me reducing my breasts "to please him and look for girlish for Daddy"
Out of scene, he's totally on board with my choice and supports me no matter what. He asked good questions about the procedure and its results. He reminds me to be realistic, and as far as what size for me to reduce to, he thinks that my surgeon and I should discuss it together, and pick a size in proportion for my size and build and aethestically pleasing overall.
While I'm in little girl headspace, and he's fucking me, he will whisper in my ear about what a good little girl I am, and how I'm doing all this just to please my Daddy....and how I will do anything to be his perfect little girl. I've lost a lot of weight recently as well, and he will reference that as proof that I'm trying hard to be his perfect little girl.
And the truth is, this fetish does provide one of many motivations for weight loss. And I do find the thought of small breasts appealing for my little girl fetish, especially those Japanese schoolgirl outfits :) Its not my primary motivation, and wouldn't be near enough all by itself, but I don't see any harm to looking forward to just another benefit of being smaller. |
|
|
| The pencil test |
[Jul. 6th, 2006|03:05 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  morose | ] |
I've turned on a lot of guys (hell and girls too) by sucking on my own nipples....
Wonder if it sounds as erotic to say you can rub your nipple on your forehead?
And no..I don't pass the pencil test.
And not only can I hold a pencil there, it's in danger of being lost.
And not only can I grip a beercan with my breast.
I can hold a five pound weight under there....and it doesn't feel particularly heavy. I didn't have the heart to try heavier weights...
Here's the proof.
WARNING: Non-work safe pics behind the cut
( Read more... )
So to all those who have tried to discourage me from moving forward..who have their breast fetish in interest more than my health or comfort.
Well I tell you, I never trusted those who were more interested in my boobs then my heart. |
|
|
| Today's obsession |
[Jun. 28th, 2006|11:24 am] |
I have this tendency when journaling to want to back up and tell the whole story in a logical chronological order. I'm going to resist that little girl urge and opt for a more random holistic piecemeal approach.
Today's obsession is breast size.
I think its because I actually never bothered to measure them before, I just eyeballed bras and tried on until what fit. It so happens that the larger the band size the larger the cup size, so to find cups big enough I have been wearing band sizes wayyy to big. So I have been wearing illfitting bras. Doh, I already knew that, but I had little choice, not really seeing anything that would fit me.
So I found this bra calculator site online, whip out the tape measure, plug in my numbers and discover the reason I can't find a decent bra in my size in the store.
The store doesn't carry my size, a size that sounds like something you would hear on Jerry Springer.
To complicate matters, different calculators give me different results...and there isn't a consistency in how its calculated.
My measurements: Under the breasts: 35
Around the breasts: 47-49 depending on how I measure them
Under the arms, over the breasts (some calcultors use this)36
Some calculators I'm "out of range"! Like this one- http://www.85b.org/bra_calc.php If I put in 46 around the breasts it says I'm a 40I.
http://www.afraidtoask.com/breast/breastsize.html This one says I'm a 40G to a "40H or larger" depending which measurements I enter.
This one is interesting: http://www.bellissimalingerie.com/catalogue/brasize.asp
It says I'm a 40FF or a 40G or a 40GG depending on what I put in.
I like this one cuz it says I'm a 38 band size....that sort of sounds smaller to me, since I judge myself by the band size.
http://ladygrace.com/article.asp?ai=32&bhcd2=1151507754
If I plug in the 47, I'm a 38I
If I plug in the 48, I'm a 38J
If I plug in the 49 I'm a 38fuckingK
Go K cup Go.
I had a friend question my need for this surgery last night. She's like, I'm big, and I would "never" get that surgery. I've *seen* her naked breasts, and she doesn't *need* the surgery! I wouldn't get it if I were her either!!
I challenged her to guess my bra size. "I dunno" she says....DD cup?
I tell her my measurements and the size and render her speechless.
Her reply? "I understand now" |
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| |
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
morphication's journal